I’m relatively new on Twitter, and so far it’s been a lot of fun watching people interact with each other, getting answers to questions, seeing updates and new information that I wouldn’t hear about till days later, and in general keeping up with friends and their activities. Unfortunately that seems to comprise about 10% of the micro-babble I witness. The other 90% is made up of people who I’m convinced don’t have real jobs and walk around in a bath robe all day.
For the first month, it was funny to see people – seemingly out of nowhere – shout things like “make love not war!” or “find your inner peace and project it to the world”. I even had passing thoughts that it was kinda cool to see positive declarations from complete strangers. Kind of like that Dave Matthews video for “Everyday” where Judah Friedlander walks around and simply gives hugs out to random people that he meets on the street. If you don’t have a warm fuzzy feeling at the end of that video then go see a therapist because you have some issues and you should work through them with a professional.
After about a month the constant flow of positive and uplifting projectiles fired at the Twitterverse became downright annoying. I had to start sifting through the massive amount of verbal refuse that was hitting my twitter client every minute like clockwork. Then curiosity got the best of me, and I started really digging in to the profiles of those folks sending these verbal gems. I started to see a pattern in their bios as terms like these kept jumping out at me:
- self improvement consultant
- life coach
- success guru
- spiritual wellness advisor
- relationship expert
- provoker of brilliance (people, I can’t make this shit up)
And what’s more, clicking to the web site they listed in their bio usually takes me to a place on the web that ranks right up there with pyramid schemes and $8 cups of coffee. They’re rip-offs.
I should say that I don’t feel as though every person on Twitter that spouts positive and uplifting messages is full of shit. Some appear to genuinely care and pay attention to their followers and what they’re going through. One such person is @MimiFeelGood. Just this week I announced I was shutting down 360matches.com. MimiFeelGood immediately replied and asked if I was OK – probably because she assumed I was another victim of the economic times we’re living in. I explained that it was simply a personal site that I no longer had time to run due to my new daughter and the demands of my real job. She laughingly replied, and it was nice to know that someone seemingly cared.
But believe me when I say people like MimiFeelGood are a drop of goodness in a sea of disingenious, late-night infomercial style bad acting. Only by constantly looking at those you initially choose to follow and weeding out this kind of junk, will you ever find any real value in Twitter.
